Utterly Unconvinced

JERRY PINTO

THERE IS, WE are told, a huge shortage of writers in Bollywood. This situation must be exacerbated now that many of the writers are turning directors. Sanjay Chhel is the latest one to do so and you can tell that this is not a healthy trend. A writer needs a Shakespearean consciousness with many voices in his head, but a director needs that, plus the 360-degree vision that notices what is behind the head of the last extra in the furthest corner of his set. Chhel does not have that vision. From the film, he seems to be the kind of director who does not know when to cut and who seems to have been unable to direct his cast.

FILM » MAAN GAYE MUGHAL-E-AZAM DIRECTOR » SANJAY CHHEL STARRING » MALLIKA SHERAWAT, RAHUL BOSE, PARESH RAWAL, KAY KAY MENON

That’s odd because the cast is not precisely high-powered. Sure, Paresh Rawal now commands a crore a film or something like that, but with the flops coming thick and fast, it’s unlikely that he’s going to be able to hold on to the status of Bollywood’s favourite bewildered and bemused Baburao.

The others? Mallika Sherawat and Rahul Bose and Kay Kay Menon. Not precisely the A list but they would have served in more experienced hands. Enter a drama troupe, stage left, singing Pyaar Kiya To Darna Kya or some suitable song. Enter a Pakistani spy, stage right, with his trench coat caught between his teeth, humming a ghazal. Sitting in the audience is the intelligence officer who has been sent to Goa to catch the spy.

This could have been a light-hearted comedy if RDX was a light-hearted subject. It is not. It was not about Pakistani spies, remember? It was about corrupt Indian customs guards, who allowed the stuff to come into the country so that thousands could die in the serial bomb blasts that were set off across Mumbai. And those corrupt Indian officials weren’t Muslims, remember? Here, Mr Chhel, are a few light-hearted subjects: you could have plans for a ray that destroys crops (Wardat) or you could have a diamond found on the battlefield of Kurukshetra with the secrets of world peace inscribed in it (Ek Se Badhkar Ek).

Set your story in the Mumbai riots and you have to go up against Black Friday. Set it down in the context of an event that we remember and that has not yet been addressed in art and we are not as easily moved. Your writing would have to be extremely precise, the balance maintained all the time, your actors superb and you would have to explain why people died and bombs went off despite your lead actor getting the bad guy in the end.

Yes, we need to laugh. We also need to laugh at the grim things that happen. Contrary to the cartoonist who suggested that India was a country where humour was a luxury, it might actually be a necessity here, if anywhere in the world.

But not this kind of irresponsible mirth. Instead, hire Ernst Lubitsch's To Be or Not To Be, no doubt available at your local DVD library.